I AM A BOARD CERTIFIED MUSIC THERAPIST!! WAHOO!!! What a relief!
Tink's doing ok here at home... i guess she was a little antzy when nick came home today, but her schedule is more consistent.
She snuggles and snuggles all evening and i LOVE it!!! she is soo fun to be around. She keeps getting more and more excited at various points during the day...the BT personality is soo coming out.
It also seems like she's warming up to Nick more too.... actually cuddled with him this evening and fell asleep in bed next to him yesterday morning.
I admit, its been hectic here adjusting to working full time and a new schedule, but our family is doing such as awesome job of learning to adapt, we're getting our act together!!!
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WARNING--LONG COMMENT
Hey you guys :)
Congratulations on the certification!! I know how hard jumping through all the hoops can be. I was just reading the latest on your blog and read about the tinkling issues with Tinker.
I can totally empathize with you. When your dog messes up in the house it can be unimaginably frustrating, especially when you are working so hard to be the best parents! Please rest assured that you are awesome doggy parents!! I'm so glad you care enough to work things through with Tink. I know you have been doing research about separation anxiety, etc. But I thought I would put my 2 cents in. You can ignore them if you want :)
I would do the simple urinalysis just to rule out the UTI (which can be triggered by stress) for peace of mind. Then you know you have a solid behavior case. You should be able to just bring a urine sample in to your vet for the test. No need to drag Tinker in.
Then---it is entirely possible that it is Separation Anxiety. Usually that is characterized by destructive/inappropriate (by human standards)behavior in the first 15-30 min that you are gone. You are taking some great steps by desensitizing her to your leaving sounds, and going slowly. I just want to emphasize SLOWLY. Even 30 seconds of you gone is a bit too much at first. It should literally be you opening the door, closing it, then treat if she stays calm. Repeat several times. Then open the door walk out, close it, and immediately return. Treat if she remains calm. Gradually extend the time you have the door closed from 1 second to 5 to 10, to 20, etc. Only moving on when she seems calm. If she starts to act anxious at any point, Back up a step. I know it sounds hard, but that really is the best way. There are some great books about it out there. One of my favorite all around behavior books is Culture Clash by Jean Donaldson. Loved it.
Another little thing: I know you hate to hear this, but you shouldn't make leaving OR coming back a big deal. It should be ho-hum, normal business. (I know, I know---it's so hard!)
The soft music is nice, but only comforting if it is associated with good stuff. In other words, if you only put it on to leave, it will just become another signal to her that the great ALONENESS is soon to come. It can be used when you are doing the desensitizing so she gets used to being calm and being rewarded for it.
Bach's Rescue Remedy always sounds like a great idea, and I've heard some good stories about it, but it never worked for me (or Dina :) I had great sucess with D.A.P, though. Dog Appeasing Pheremone. Great stuff. An actual synthetic hormone that mimics what they get from mom when they are puppies, so it is comforting and seems to work wonders with my dog.
One last note: some books I've read stress that while you are working on desensitizing, the dog should never feel the full onslaught of being ALONE, so they never go into panic/anxiety mode, which can set your training back significantly. I fully understand you both work, and that is probably impossible(my poor girl twiddles her tail for 8-11 hours most days alone), I just mention it so you are aware of the hurdles.
Oh--and one thing more: dogs aren't capable of spite :) though I know that sassy, smart BTs seem so good at expressing it, they are being only that: smart and sassy. For better or worse, dogs live in the moment, and don't plot revenge or scheme disobedience. They just react to our body language.
Finally: I can tell you are committed to Tink, and I know this will work out. I would echo the quote to go with your heart. I know the behavior books in and out, but every dog is different. Enjoy the learning process as you grow in your relationship together.
Love,
Sarah
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